Advice From Mom: For Mother’s Day
By Marcie Bolton
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I remember my mom telling me when I was younger to be sweet. She said to watch and read the news, in order to have interesting ideas to ponder. Years later when I was a young mother of three, my mum would write me letters in her beautiful penmanship telling me about her days, and she would always give me a bit of advice. Having raised 6 children, she had some good ideas to share. She said to have a nap when the kids have theirs; do a load of laundry every day -fold and put away. Have the kids pick their toys up every day. Start the dishwasher before bed and empty it in the morning; simple, solid advice. For this piece I went around collecting information from people regarding the best advice their mothers gave them. Some people responded quickly off the cuff, remembering a very clear smidgeon of wisdom. Others took a minute, looking at their feet and within to conjure a memory that truly resonated with them. Here are a few:
“Never ask how a funeral was. Never ask a grandmother if she is pregnant. Always put the lid on the mayonnaise, and put it back in the fridge.”- Lori G. of Middlebury. Sarah I. of Middlebury said: “My mom always told me to obey my husband, which is really funny because it was a very matriarchal family! My mother and grandmother totally ruled the roost.” Debbie H. of Middlebury said her mom expounded on the idea that absence makes the heart grow fonder and experience is the best teacher. She had two brothers that were in the service during the Vietnam era, When they returned Debbie couldn’t have agreed with her mom more. “Don’t run with scissors,” Sabrina B’s mom told her. “Don’t take any wooden nickels,” is the advice Sue from Leicester’s mom gave her. Sara’s mom said to her at one point: “Have a cup of coffee and push on through.” Jackie N.’s mom said to stay away from carnival boys, and told her not to get carried away with the romance of prom night – “what would you do to your father?” Peter S. of Middlebury said from the time he was an 8 year old to his Olympic trial swimming events, his mom consistently gave him the same solid advice: always do your best. Scott B. said after going to college he returned home for a while, not quite sure what to do with his life. His mom gave him one of the best pieces of advice, which made an impression –“Get out of the house.” He did just that and traveled Europe, which started him on a positive trajectory. Phyllis L. said her mom, who was of German decent, told her to never let them see you cry. Chris P. said he remembers his mom telling his sisters never to give it away before getting married. He thought that was interesting advice because after his mom passed away, he and his siblings learned that their mother was pregnant on their parent’s wedding day. Roxanne of Leicester reminisced about her mom saying to treat people the way they want to be treated, and Claire S. told me her mom said “You need to feel sorry for people who are angry, because they don’t know how to live.” Mary B. of New Haven says her mom always told her: “Patience is a virtue, because if you are an impatient person it leads to inner conflict. Patience helps increase your peace of mind.” The second piece of advice from her mother was: “take the bull by the horns because it is easy to put things off. Just do it, whatever it is.”
Moms are such an integral part of our lives. They feed, care, love, and nurture us. However long they are in our lives, they are the ones who know us best. Moms know how to tell us that life may be hard sometimes, but you will get through it. Moms have been through it all, and we will get though as well. They help make us who we are. Remembering mom and what she gave to you whether it is a sweet or a difficult lesson is a part of mother’s day. Some people may think it is another holiday enhancing consumerism, but one cannot argue just how much our mother’s are a part of our lives. Happy Mother’s Day to all of the mothers out there in Vermont!